i've created a cover that completely wigged out an author and we had to redesign the whole thing. i've recorded my absences incorrectly and had a talking to about it. TWICE, because i managed to do it wrong TWO DIFFERENT WAYS. on my review, the only thing my boss had to say about me, either positively or negatively, was that my reports were late being filed. i used the wrong source for my travel expenses. and this afternoon i got a talking to because i'm paying my reviewers too much money for their help. oh bejeezus. i mean, i've been doing this six months. this is NOT the first check he's had to approve. don't you think SOMEONE could have told me what the going rate was before this? i mean, does it really harm anyone to just post the fucking information somewhere? am i just supposed to intrinsically know this stuff? i feel like an idiot, and i JUST SENT OUT a bunch of requests at the higher prices. FUCK.
i just love feeling like a scolded child at work. LOVE IT. and i mean, it's all procedural stuff. i KNOW how to do my fucking job, and if you want me to PAY a certain amount, or CODE YOUR FUCKING REPORT a certain way, then by all means,let me in on the info beforehand!!
and it didn't help that his toadie assistant was leering over his shoulder the whole time during my talking to. i could feel his lizard eyes gazing upon my discomfort, which just added to the humiliation. i swear he gets grim satisfaction over other people being put in their place.
one of these days i'm just going to lose it. it almost happened today, but when i opened my mouth, i just started sputtering, and couldn't think of how to put what i had to say diplomatically, so ended up saying something lame and neutral, and just got the hell out of there.